Give advice freely and don't wait to be asked.  Not everyone realizes how sharp you really are.

Talk about gourmet food to someone on a diet.  It lets them practice self control.

When at the buffet line take your time.  Folks behind you will appreciate the chance to work up their appetite.

Ram your grocery cart into somebody else's car.  You'll be long gone before they even get out of the store.

Ignore all posted signs.  This country was built on free thinking rebels like you.

Park close enough to the car next to you so that they can't get their door open.  Crawling in the window will give them some much needed exercise.

Safety on the road is very important.  Always use your bright lights.